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Jan. 24th, 2008 @ 12:58 am Paramdam
i wonder what's been happening in the LJ world...
it's 2008 and my last entry was in 2004.
it's been a long time that's for sure.
dunno really what made me decide to log back on.
my life seems so different now from how i've chronicled them here in LJ.
It's taken a turn for the... well, more of a different turn.
things seemed so much simpler back then, now things have become way too complicated
to elaborate on a short journal entry. emo all over the place. shakeups in all facets of my life
- family, friends and all that shit. career, what life you wanna live, what kind of person you want to be.
it's just really different now, and i can't really say that i'm a miserable sod,
who fucked things up, and lost stability and all foundation. it's exciting in a way, but stressful. 2008 will be a year of change - that's for certain.
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Jul. 10th, 2005 @ 10:36 pm HEY LIVEJOURNAL WORLD!
Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: I wanna hold your hand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I realized it's been a year since Gel's Hiphop Party! Sure has been a long time...

Hey LJ World! It's the prodigal son, back from limbo.

Anyway, a lot has happened since I joined REP and played the role of Nathan Detroit in Guys and Dolls.

First, I am on a semester-long trial basis as a Political Science Major in the Ateneo. I used to be in Management, but for some weird reason, I shifted to a course which embodies everything I have hated since birth. By trial basis, I mean that it is a must that I obtain at least a C in all Political Science subjects, lest I'll be asked to shift to another course. I have to admit, PolSci isn't really la-la land where you can slack off - and just voice out your stand on certain issues that concern our society.

Where Math perplexes the mind of a SOM student, mountains and heaps bombard a Pol Sci student everyday. Just when you thought you've finished a long chapter on Plato and his goddamn Republic, you have to read another chapter again for next meeting. But like a friend said, you need something to keep you smart despite the new paths you tread in life. So, I might as well give POLSCI a shot. This is of course, amidst all the embarassing citations of my father in Politics and Governance Class, and even in Intro to PolSci. Good grief! Please don't ask me anything about what my dad think... I barely see him! HAHA :D

Secondly, I have joined Repertory yet again. Whoever thought that the last rehearsal for Guys and Dolls would be the last time I'd get the chance to step into the halls of Rep again. I am once again, dragged into the fold - this time, to play the role of Mr. Sew and a member of the chorus for the play Emperor's New Clothes. It's hard work, balancing a 7-11pm rehearsal every Monday to Friday and all the readings required for PolSci (this is amidst my semester-long trial run), but somehow I can manage to juggle both. It only comes with a price - cranky and tired Toff in the mornings. I think I see myself doing theater as a sideline in the future. It's always been a passion of mine - performing onstage. I'm just so thankful that I am given the opportunity to pursue that passion.



Thirdly, I am super obsessed with Wicked! Day after day, night after night, all I sing is Defying Gravity from the broadway musical Wicked! Earthalot got me hooked, and I can't seem to stop. Now, I am currently getting Tiamencs hooked on it too. It's just breathtaking, and the songs are of the caliber that'll get you all teary-eyed and covered in goosebumps. Do yourselves a favor and download a song or two from the musical Wicked. You won't regret it!



And of course, why open with a question regarding Gel's Party last year?

It's because for those of you who know me so well, it was the day that I finally mustered the guts and the courage to ask Cam to be my girlfriend. And lo and behold! She gave her sweet yes - of course, the blooper moments that led to that were just a hint of things to come. In this magical rollercoaster ride that we've had for almost a year, through our many ups and downs, and countless defining moments through those awful storms - we've kept together and been able to settle our differences, or is it sameness (hehe). At the end of the day, no matter how much we can get so hotheaded or hate each other, I still love her so much and it's beyond any word I can utter from my mouth or put down in writing. And she loves me so much too!

Fresh from Subic of course, it was really a trip to remember. P.S. Cam wants a pet tropical penguin. I want a pet whale! How do we get those? hehe :D

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May. 13th, 2005 @ 11:48 am Random Thoughts
Current Mood: creativecreative
Current Music: Defying Gravity from Wicked
I've heard so many people diss the Crench for what it was.
Some say it's some obnoxious, loud group that hangs out in the cafeteria, not caring about the world.
Some say it's so pathetic.
Some say the name is baduy.
Some abhor Crench with a Passion.
Some make fun of it for merely existing.
Some even make mock versions of it.

I've heard many a people diss it - and I can only think of one reason.
Insecure! - coz these people probably don't have a family as tight as Crench.

Crench ain't a career that you have to work hard to stay on.
You don't have to change who you are to belong.
It's more of a home that you can return to...
a willing father when the prodigal son strays farther and farther away from home.


It's a comfort zone you can run to when people don't understand you,
or when you're tired of being with people you're not even comfortable being with.
It's a family. It's a home.

So for people who have nothing better to do, who have nothing better to say so they end up dissing our family, who are plain insecure, who are so pathetic - I pity you.


I think I'm getting sick. I've never been this exhausted in my life. It's like day after day, all Toff ever does is, practice, practice, practice. But hey, we're done with blocking. It's choreography nalang...Then we'll have a whole show. Whoopee!
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May. 1st, 2005 @ 11:49 pm For it's good old reliable NATHAN!
Current Mood: anxiousanxious
Current Music: Defying Gravity from Wicket



Guys, do you know the play Guys and the Dolls? Well, it's a sorta old new york-mafia play about gamblers and their gals. Well, something like that. Comedy, Love story, Musical, the works...

Anyway, we've been rehearsing all the songs of ACT 1 for this play for the past three days since we're staging it on May 21 at ONstage Greenbelt for our showcase in Repertory.

There are 4 huge roles in this play As you can see in the movie poster... and I was cast as one of them --- NATHAN DETROIT!</font>

Holy shit! I was expecting to be cast in one of the smaller roles, like Joey Biltmore or something. But I end up being one of the leads! Bittersweet Lord!

It's sweet since hey, roles like these only come your way once. Sieze the opportunity and be the best you can be. It's like hanging my clothes as Toff de Venecia and becoming Nathan Detroit. Nathan Detroit with his New Yorker accent, his larger than life persona, his hustler antics, and 100% bolero attitude. It's bitter since I'm like one of the pivotal roles who drive and move the play. Well, All roles move the play, but if I make a mistake, holy shit!

Ok, I know I just talked about the whole "hanging my clothes" and "becoming Nathan" but can I really do this? In an adult class of talented individuals where I am second to the youngest, can I really do this? A cloud of doubt enters my head once in a while, but hey, once I'm on stage - with costume, make-up, and the whole essence of Nathan, they'll probably forget that I'm eighteen. hehe.

Well, ika nga ni pareng Eminem, "opportunity comes once in a lifetime, yo!" So why not?

Guys, I hope you can watch my play.

GUYS AND DOLLS. May 21, 7pm at Onstage Greenbelt. Tickets are price at P100. Just contact me if you wanna come and see me act. hehe.

It'll really mean a lot. Ay wait, if you watch, then i'll get more nervous then I'll forget my line. Shet! but seeing that my OWN PARENTS WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE MY IN THIS PLAY SINCE THEY'LL BE IN SOME FOREIGN DIPLOMATIC THING IN BRAZIL, then... I guess I need to see familiar faces and people who are like family to me there. hehe. BREAK A LEG!
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Apr. 22nd, 2005 @ 03:50 pm is this hilarious or what?
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: Happiness from Charlie Brown
my homework for photoclass tomorrow is to take a portrait of someone ala JAMES DEAN.
since nicky is like m.i.a., and he's been so busy, i got my dad's security guy instead.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...
presenting Major Rubite as "James Dean." HAHAHAHAHA!!!! :D:D:D


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Apr. 22nd, 2005 @ 03:26 am Under the Fire of Baby Barredo
Current Mood: enthralledenthralled
Current Music: Suddenly Seamore from Little Shop of Horrors
I am having the time of my life in Repertory Class. Cam's probably had enough of all the wonderful insights that i've gained from none other than Tita Baby Barredo, the co-founder of Repertory Philippines. Tita Bibot Amador was the other one; however, she just recently passed away.

I've been attending Rep class from 6-8 pm everyday for the past five days, and I've gotten to know some of the most diverse people you can ever imagine.

I was talking to this girl, who I assumed wasn't in college anymore, and asked her what she does. Then she gave me flat out, "I'm a mother." Woah! I'm classmates with fathers, husbands who aren't allowed by their wives to go out with us after the workshops (haha), mothers-to-be, mothers, college students, and working people. And I've loving it to the core.

my class


Most importantly, I've been learning a lot of things... some the hard way.

When I first sang my piece, "Some Enchanted Evening" in front of Tita Baby, she said...
1) That was terrible. You're using your voice and not your diaphragm.
2) Why did you pick a song that a widower would sing? You're only what? Eighteen? CHANGE IT!
3) You were with Charlie before in the Kinder-Prep play in CSA right? You were so cute! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?


Talk about self-confidence. Mine was at an all-time low. But then again, as the days progressed, I started to understand the beauty of her frankness, of how genuine each, "Christopher, your body movement is so lousy!" could be. I went through the fire of Tita Baby Barredo, and started improving on myself. I am more expressive now, with my body, my voice, my character, and my anima. It's just like hatching from a cocoon, or sprouting from the ground. And the catalyst was Tita Baby, rather, the art that she represented. In its pristine state, unsullied by laziness and lack of professionalism that the modern Filipino continues to suffer as of today, Tita Baby had the passion. And it burned through my soul.

Tita Baby's Words of Wisdom

1) Acting is being. It is never reacting. It is when you hang your clothes, and put on the persona of the character you're playing. You become Eliza Dolittle, or Maria Vontrapp, or Oliver, or Seamore.
2) Life is never boring, for life is beautiful. When things get tedious, you can do something to make it different. Reinvent yourself.
3) Actors are the most generous and the bravest people in the world. It is no joke to stand before a live audience and perform live while trying to please them. You can never think about yourself.
4) Some people have the talent.Some of my classmates have the knack for singing, or acting. Others like me have to work hard for it. We will never be as good a singer or actor as them; vis-a-vis, they may never be as (fill in the blanks) as me. But we can be a believable actor or singer or writer or speaker so as long as we work hard to become one.
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Apr. 16th, 2005 @ 05:45 pm Photo School Day One
Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
Current Music: Firefly by Eric Kupper
I learned a lot.
According to Tita Mandy...
1) fashion shoots should always be cropped before or after the joints and not on the joints.
2) The most important element of picture is the lighting.
3) In fashion shoots, the focal point should be the clothes and not the model.
4) Even great photographers such as her use Photoshop. hahaha :D

Day One was great... great classmataes, or should I say, colleagues (in the words of Mia, how matyur!), great concepts.... only, my Exilim sucked next to all their 30-120 mm cameras the price over 70,000 above. shet mehn! my pics suck next to theirs.... dun dun dun!

Time to get myself a professional camera, gotta blend in with my colleagues. mwahahahaha!


china Ven
My Class
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Apr. 16th, 2005 @ 05:27 am Yesterday...
Current Mood: creativecreative
Current Music: Happy by Fat Boy Slim
I joined Repertory Philippines. Weekday classes from 6-8pm.
On Monday, I sing a broadway piece infront of Baby Barredo.

Later on, I attend Mandy Navasero's photography class. Saturdays from 10 to 5.
And today's syllabus is on fashion photography.
wow, i actually get to work with models. whapack!

Of course, this is all a result of having no summer class
coz fucking reg was so screwed up,
and i ran out of MATH 12 slots,
talk about overload for first sem.

ATENEO sucks! But I'm there anyway... haha! That's the story of life.

p.s. i'm also signin up for bartending class, french class in Alliance, and Fitness First. Time to work out these bitchtits.
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Apr. 1st, 2005 @ 01:28 am Travel Ravel
Current Mood: excitedexcited
Current Music: Oompah Loompah
Good grief! I just got back from an 8-day Hongkong-Beijing-Hongkong-Macao-Zhuhai-Macao-Hongkong-Macao-Hongkong Trip yesterday (Why the repeating Hongkong-Macao route?

Well, my dad stayed in Macao the whole time. Then we came from Beijing and met him there. Then Mom went to Shenzhen with Tita Betchay while Manoy JM and I joined Joseph and the Wongs in Hongkong. Then Mom picked us up two days later to join dad for Easter Sunday in Macao. Then we came back to Hongkong to see dad off and to shop the night away. Macao is actually just a ferryboat away from Hongkong, around one hour.

Why good grief? Well, coz tomorrow, I mean later, in a matter of hours , I leave for an 8-day Bora Trip! Shet mehn! But hey, i'm excited as hell! It's eight days of paradise! I can hardly wait :D:D:D
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Mar. 12th, 2005 @ 12:39 pm The Bright Side of Things
Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Current Music: Any Lucky Penny
While dining at the lunch table today,
I finally realized something that hasn't been clear to me for a long time now...

They were talking about death...
about those children who ate something in Bohol and died because of it,
children unknowing of what dangers they'd encounter upon nibbling a piece of the food...
and I realized that like KC's death...
the fuzz on their demise will eventually die down, and people will move on.

I remember years back,
when I was in Sunday Lunch...
my cousin called and said that Luigi Lagdameo got into a car accident...
I had just met him from the prom earlier as she was Tintin's date...
I've seen him around, he was an acquaintance.
it all happened one night, while driving home from the bar...
while he was with his friends.
I went to the wake even if I didn't know him so well 'coz I empathized with my fellow youth.
he was so young, why did he have to leave?

I remember years back,
while watching t.v. that an actor had died...
Miko Sotto. He fell from a building.
Some say that he was drinking that night -
reason why he lost his balance and fell off the ledge.
Again, I felt bad for him - coz he was too young to die.
So much in store for him, and one fateful day made it fall apart.

I remember months ago,
when I heard from my sister that Kitty Yoshida,
that girl who always welcomes us in Sugi Greenbelt,
had hung herself in her bedroom.
I was shocked as I didn't think anyone would ever do that to him/herself.
She was a friend of my sister's - of an older age group.
I felt bad for her as her life was just about to start.

I remember in Ateneo,
when Xavier Yu was the talk of the town.
He was a guy who fell off from the balcony of the Prince David Condominium.
Like Miko, he lost balance and was not able to recover it.
He was just hanging out with his friends, I heard.
So much can change in a split of a second.
And it was just saddening that he moved about in the same places as me,
And I never got to meet him, or perchance come across him while walking along CTC.

Back at the dining table,
while listening to my parents and their friends in an intimate conversation,
I finally realized something.
I always thought that these deaths were pointless - an unfair act of God.
I could not discern through the ordeal of pain and suffering, and dealing with the painstaking aftermath of losing someone you love so dearly.

Yet, as my mom continued to speak about her project, I discerned through the death of my sister and realized that not all deaths can make a difference. So many people die everyday, and some, out of poverty are not even grieved upon anymore - they are immediately buried. So many deaths occur, but not all deaths can make a difference.

With KC's passing, I realized that she had done so much (although it had to be the hard way).
In addition to the asbestos suits for the firemen and the KC foundation, my mom has now formed a support group for mothers which she has already pitched to Tita Dinky Soliman, the secretary of DSWD. It was too help mothers who are dealing with the loss of a child.
The group now includes...
Tita Ali Sotto, Tita Le Lagdameo, Bebe Yu, and Glo Yoshida - the mother's of the youth who had also passed away along with KC. And everyday, more and more mothers are joining her cause. Now, they're trying to contact the moms of Camille Illustre, Bea Liwanag, the 16 year-old girl from ICA who died in her sleep, any many other youth who left us at a young age. Together, they are gonna help each other deal with their grief, and with the help of Tita Dinky, they'll reach out to the other mothers out there who cannot afford counseling, who do not have time to grieve because of the harshness of life, who could not bounce back from their tragedy and face life again.

It's true - not all deaths can make a difference. But I am fortunate that my sister's, along with Miko's, Luigi's, Xavier's, and Kitty's and many others, can truly make a difference.
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